Project Management Books -
The Truth About Getting Your Point Across...And Nothing But The
Truth
The
Truth About Getting Your Point Across...And Nothing But the
Truth (Prentice Hall 2006) is an experience-based, practical
guide for anyone who needs to get his or her point across in
just about any setting. Whether you are a first-line
manager in a large corporation, a CEO of a small business, or a
president of a PTA, GYPA will help you navigate
difficult communication situations and give you some very
practical tips for dealing with a wide range of communications
challenges. There are 59 truths grouped into 13 real-life
parts. Depending on the part, some will apply to you,
others may not; but there is enough breadth in categories that
you will likely find at least a couple of the truths relevant
and (hopefully) helpful to you.
This book summary contains a concise overview of each part within GYPA. Just click on a hyperlink below and you will be taken to the section of the summary desired. Click the word "top" at the end of each summary to be taken back to the table of contents.
Order The Truth About
Getting Your Point Across
here.
My sincere hope is that you enjoy this summary and that what I
have to share in this summary and the book help you to get your
point across more effectively. Please drop me an email at
point@leadingonedge.com
and let me know what you think.
To Your Effectiveness -
Lonnie Pacelli
Introduction
Part I: The Truth About You and Your
Recipient
Part II: The Truth About Setting
Direction
Part III: The Truth About Running
Meetings
Part IV: The Truth About Developing
Effective Presentations
Part V: The Truth About Writing
Status Reports
Part VI: The Truth About
Brainstorming
Part VII: The Truth About Problem
Solving
Part VIII: The Truth About
Interviewing
Part IX: The Truth About Giving
Feedback
Part X: The Truth About Being a Good
Listener
Part XI: The Truth About Informal
Communications
Part XII: The Truth About
Influencing Those Who Don't Work for You
Part XIII: The Truth About
Communicating Globally
Introduction
When I started working on The Truth About Getting Your Point Across with Prentice Hall, I did some serious soul searching about how to approach the book to best relate to you, the busy reader who wants to get some good practical advice quickly then move on to the next item on your to-do list. I realized that, for this book to be most useful, it needed to be something you didn’t just read once then put on a shelf to forever gather dust. It needed to be something that was easy for you to pick up, get a few quick nuggets, and then apply them immediately. Because I wanted it to be personal, I exposed my own failures (and a couple of successes) to help you avoid many of the perils and pitfalls I have encountered throughout my career. To that end, each of the truths in this book is written with the following in mind:
- The truths are experience-based – I’ve made tons of mistakes in over 20 years of attempting to get my point across in a myriad of situations. The stories, explanations, and advice you’ll read are in large part based on things I have done wrong during my career. I’ve been whacked with a 2x4 across the head plenty of times when it comes to getting your point across and have learned many lessons the hard way. My sincere hope is that you will be able to avoid many of the mistakes I’ve made, and this will help you get your point across more effectively.
- The truths are situational – I wanted to engineer a book that would be easy for you to read through once then quickly refer back to again and again depending on your particular situation, whether you are running a brainstorming session, developing a direction statement, or working with colleagues from another culture.
- The truths are stand-alone – I consciously designed each truth so it could stand on its own. This permits you to do more in-the-moment learning by quickly reading a truth, getting some practical advice, then getting back to delivering results for your organization. Consequently, you may see advice duplicated in more than one truth. I thought it was important to paint a holistic picture in each truth to help you, the busy reader, be more effective.
- The truths are practical – Simply put, these truths work. Nothing fancy or heady; just, direct and practical advice. Some truths buck conventional wisdom, others reinforce things you may alleady know. I have learned (again, by doing things the wrong way) that many times we know the right thing to do, but we don’t always do the right thing. If you start reading a truth and think “yeah, I know this stuff,” honestly ask yourself: I know this, but do I do it? Knowing something is great, but doing what you know delivers results.
You’re busy, and I’m honored that you chose to take time out of your busy life to read what I have to say. I realize I owe you a rich and fulfilling experience that will help you get your point across more effectively in day-to-day situations. My sincere hope is I have in some way helped you and have contributed to your success in whatever you do.
Order The Truth About Getting Your Point Across here.
Part
I: The Truth About You and Your Recipient
The core message of Part I is that great communication starts with a strong understanding of both your own communication style as well as that of your recipient. When you as a sender take time to understand the style of your recipient and tailor your communication to his or her style, you stand a much greater likelihood of getting your point across effectively because you and your recipient are working from a common frame of reference. Sometimes it means minor adjustments, sometimes not so minor. In any event, the most important thing is to get your point across such that your recipient can align with your message in as little time as possible.
This part contains five truths, as follows:
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Truth 1: You can be a great communicator! - Great communicators can be made, it just takes courage, conviction, wisdom, credibility, and clarity.
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Truth 2: Seek to understand your recipient - Getting your point across starts with understanding your recipient's communication preferences and style.
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Truth 3: Communication styles aren’t one-size fits all - Great communicators know how that it is important to adjust your communication style and method to your recipient.
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Truth 4: If you think it doesn’t make sense, it probably doesn’t - Focus on being practical with your communication and let your common sense guide your style.
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Truth 5: Help others to help themselves - Help your recipients be better communicators by sharing tools, techniques, and lessons learned.
Order The Truth About Getting Your Point Across here.
Part II:
The Truth About Setting Direction
The focus of Part II is in establishing direction and navigating execution to achieve the direction statement for any organization. So many times organizations get wrapped up in terminology and process that the resulting direction statement becomes a mass of gobbledygook which no one understands or follows. Direction statements need to clearly direct, inspire, and align a team to deliver, not get stuffed in a drawer only to be pulled out again the next time a direction statement needs to be developed.
This part contains five truths, as follows:
- Truth 6: Don’t make creating a direction statement harder than it needs to be - Don't get wrapped up in terminology or worrying about whether a statement sounds more like a vision, mission, goal, or objective. Keep it simple.
- Truth 7: Don’t be a cave dweller - Developing a direction statement is a team activity; you won't get buy-in when you develop a direction statement on your own and divulge it to the team.
- Truth 8: About-faces are OK, just don’t get dizzy - Changing direction when warranted is good, just don't have a "direction du jour." You'll just confuse the team, your stakeholders, and probably yourself.
- Truth 9: Direction statements need to be lived to be effective - Don't stuff your direction statement in a drawer never to see light of day again; keep it at the forefront and continually remind the team of your direction.
- Truth 10: When others understand your direction they can help you get there faster - When stakeholders and other influencers understand and buy into your direction statement, they can help you get there faster and work for you in achieving your direction as opposed to against you.
Order The Truth About Getting Your Point Across here.
Part III:
The Truth About Running Meetings
It doesn't matter whether or not you run a large
organization, own a small business, or work at a non-profit
organization, poor meetings can and do happen. It could be
due to a poor (or nonexistent) agenda, a boisterous
pontificator, or uninformed attendees. In any event,
meetings which are run poorly with weak results will frustrate
the attendees and cause them to avoid your meetings in the
future. Getting a good grip on running effective meetings
minimizes the frustration and helps you accomplish the meeting
goals. >
This part contains six truths, as follows:
-
Truth 11: Too many attendees spoil the meeting - Control your attendee list and you'll reduce the likelihood of your meetings becoming runaway trains.
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Truth 12: Watch the pontificator! - There's one in every crowd; that one person who likes to wax poetic for hours on end about nearly any topic. Your job in running the meeting is to minimize the situations where the pontificator hijacks the meeting.
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Truth 13: Drive a tight agenda, don’t let it drive you - Setting an agenda is super critical, but as the meeting owner you need to be cognizant of what is happening in the meeting and tweak the agenda real-time to ensure the meeting stays fruitful.
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Truth 14: One less meeting gets you home in time for dinner - Sometimes the best meeting is no meeting at all. Think about ways to get your point across without having to get face-to-face if possible.
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Truth 15: Let decided decisions stay decided - When decisions are made in meetings it's crucial to clearly document the decision and to allow for the decision to be implemented. Decisions which get undone and re-thought from meeting to meeting don't get implemented and just frustrate the group.
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Truth 16: Action items get done when action items are managed - Action items may get assigned out of meetings, but if no one is minding the action-item store then the likelihood of the action items getting completed are minimal at best. Gain a reputation as a follow-up hound and action items will get done.
Order The Truth About Getting Your Point Across here.
Part IV: The Truth About Developing Effective
Presentations
The Book of Lists reports that when asked of their greatest
fear 41% of people responded with public speaking, ranking it as
their number one fear. You find out that you have to present to
a group of people. Maybe you’re one of those 41% who would
rather die than speak to an audience. For some, the fear is so
paralyzing that they simply would rather quit their job than
stand in front of a group of people. Some people
will always have an insurmountable fear of presenting. Unless
their job requires that they do presentations, let them be.
Presenting isn’t for everyone and we shouldn’t put people on the
spot if they truly hate presenting and it’s not a job
requirement.
If it is a job requirement, though, those with a fear of
speaking either need to get a new job or they have to overcome
their fear. If you are in the camp that needs to speak in
front of a group as part of your job, you can ease some of the
pain and become effective at getting your point across through
the presentations you deliver.
This part contains five truths, as follows:
-
Truth 17: Give them a reason to listen to you - Your presentation first and foremost has to be compelling and relevant for your audience. Your job is to capture their intrigue in the first few minutes so they'll want to listen to the rest of your presentation.
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Truth 18: Entertaining an audience breeds effective learning - I'm not talking about juggling or spinning plates on poles; what I am talking about is making your presentation lively and interesting enough to where it is easy to absorb the message.
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Truth 19: Pictures and graphics are great, but can get really annoying - Visual aids are great when it comes to delivering presentations, but sometimes your pictures and graphics can detract from your message. Don't let pictures or graphics be an annoyance.
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Truth 20: Relax, the audience is rooting for you - Generally speaking, your audience doesn't want to see you crash and burn right on the stage. Your audience doesn't want the next hour of their life to be miserable; they want to see you succeed and to feel like they haven't just wasted their time watching you fail.
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Truth 21: Develop content once, use it a thousand times - Developing and delivering great presentations is great, but if you have to spend hours and hours preparing for each presentation you'll burn a lot of unnecessary time. Recycle your content and enable yourself to give standing-o presentations with a minimum of effort.
Order The Truth About Getting Your Point Across here.
Part
V: The Truth About Writing Status Reports
As leaders, clearly communicating progress on what you are doing is just part of the job. No one really likes writing status reports and I've yet to meet someone wake up at 5 a.m. saying "I can't wait to write that status report today!" Like it or not, status reports are just part of the job. Your job is to ensure the status you communicate is timely, relevant, applicable, and concise. Getting your point across means you understand what your recipient needs and you deliver a status report that meets the need and gets you any help you need.
This part contains five truths, as follows:
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Truth 22: Focused status reports get read; random ones don’t - Getting your point across when reporting status on activities in your organization means keeping it concise, relevant, and focused. Rambling status reports which try to pass the weight test only confuse recipients or, even worse, turn them off to where they don't read your status reports.
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Truth 23: Communicate status in less than a minute - Using a series of indicators and a structured format will minimize the time your recipient spends trying to understand how you're communicating status and focus on what you're trying to communicate.
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Truth 24: Know who, when and how - Understanding your recipients' need for status information, when they need to receive the information, the frequency it needs to be received, and the most efficient method of transmittal is crucial to getting your status report point across.
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Truth 25: No one reads yesterday’s news - Creating a well-written status report is great. Sending it out with stale information makes it a waste of time. Sending timely information gives recipients time to react to issues and boosts your credibility as an effective manager.
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Truth 26: Status reports aren’t code for cover your butt - Hiding behind a status report or using a status report as a vehicle for absconding responsibility can label you as a cowardly lion. Status reports are meant to inform recipients and solicit help; not something which you can hide behind.
Order The Truth About Getting Your Point Across here.
Part VI:
The Truth About Brainstorming
Brainstorming; either a very effective means of generating big ideas or a massive waste of energy and resources. Well-planned brainstorming sessions with an unbiased, effective facilitator which generate usable output are magic. Poorly planned brainstorming sessions which yield no fruit and are facilitated by either an biased or closed-minded facilitator will fall in the loser column. You can make brainstorming work very effectively for you so long as you follow some basic guidelines in preparation, execution, and follow-up.
This part contains four truths, as follows:
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Truth 27: There’s a right time and place for brainstorming - Effective brainstorming sessions start with a comfortable setting which promotes free-thinking among attendees. Choosing the right time and place for brainstorming is vital to ensuring positive results.
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Truth 28: There truly is no such thing as a stupid idea - Free-thinking, out of the box ideas means attendees need to feel secure that they won't be judged and won't have their ideas criticized as stupid or worthless. Let the ideas flow then prioritize the ideas later.
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Truth 29: Brainstorming isn’t code for waste of time - We've all been to brainstorming sessions which went absolutely nowhere and yielded no usable fruit. Brainstorming sessions don't need to be a colossal waste of time provided they are well planned, well executed, and something is done with the output.
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Truth 30: Biased facilitators torpedo brainstorming sessions - Brainstorming requires a comfort with ambiguity, particularly when it comes to the facilitator. The facilitator needs to be open, unbiased, and willing to go where the ideas go.
Order The Truth About Getting Your Point Across here.
Part VII:
The Truth About Problem Solving
Leaders are paid in part to solve problems. The greater the responsibility or the higher the pay, the bigger the problems the leader is expected to solve. Great leaders employ outstanding problem solving skills and know how to implement great solutions effectively. They are able to look at a problem from multiple vantage points, investigate sound (and sometimes creative) alternatives, implement the solution, and pull the reins back in on a solution that doesn't appear to be going well.
This part contains five truths, as follows:
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Truth 31: Every solution needs a problem - So have you ever been approached by a salesperson claiming to have the solution to some perceived problem? His or her job is to search for problems and to show how their solution solves the problem. Many times, the problem/solution match is legitimate. Sometimes, though, proposed solutions don't have a real, tangible problem. Every solution needs a legitimate, tangible problem otherwise the solution isn't really a solution.
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Truth 32: Choices and consequences make the solution - In solving problems, concise, articulate alternatives along with the consequences of each alternative help ensure a more effective and holistic solution. Poorly articulated or non-existent alternatives with associated consequences drastically limit the solution set and reduce the overall quality of the implemented solution.
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Truth 33: Dig hard for that third alternative - Anyone can come up with a run-of-the-mill list of alternatives. Great leaders are able to look "in between the lines" and come up with creative alternatives which more effectively address a problem than the average Joe who just restates the obvious.
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Truth 34: A solution is only as good as its implementation - So maybe you come up with a great solution to a problem. Now what? A solution which can't be implemented is only as good as the paper it was written on. Crisp implementation execution rounds out the problem solving process.
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Truth 35: Bad decisions that don’t get fixed grow into disasters - OK, so sometimes a bad decision gets made. It happens to the best of us. Attentive leaders watch decisions closely and fix problems before they erupt into major disasters. Leaders who fall asleep at the wheel end up riding their poor decision right off a cliff.
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Part VIII:
The Truth About Interviewing
Ah, the interviewing dance. It's the time where we dress up nice, smell real good, and think of the pithy questions which will impress the dickens out of the interviewer. Regardless of whether you like the dance or not, interviewing is the crucial component which inform both the interviewer and interviewee of a fit. Relax, the dance doesn't have to be painful. There are some basic truths which can reduce the interviewing anxiety and help prepare the interviewee for the interview experience.
This part contains five truths, as follows:
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Truth 36: You can’t over-prepare for an interview - There is simply no such thing as learning too much about a company and the job in which you are interviewing for. When it comes to preparing for an interview, it is well worth it for you to take the time to learn as much as you can about your prospective employer. The knowledge can only help you.
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Truth 37: Critical thinking drills influence hiring decisions - There actually is relevance to the "why are manhole covers round?" questions. Employers are assessing your ability to think under pressure, looking at your creativity, and gauging how you will function in the employer's environment. Expect the off-the-wall question and have fun with the answer.
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Truth 38: Lie about your credentials, kill your career - Simply put, there is no room for lying on a resume about your credentials. If you do it, you're likely to be found out, and you will put your career in massive jeopardy. It's not worth it.
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Truth 39: Babbling is for babies, not interviews - Interviewers are looking for clear, crisp thinkers and talkers. Interviewees who babble randomly hoping that a pearl of wisdom will emerge from the soliloquy don't get invited back for a second interview\. Treat each word as if you are spending a dollar.
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Truth 40: Impress first, then talk compensation - Playing hard-to-get may work when trying to get a date to the dance; it doesn't work when interviewing for a job. Coming into an interview leading with the dollar amount it will take to get you positions you as an arrogant doof and will in the highest likelihood turn off your interviewer. Knock the interviewer's socks off first, then discuss compensation.
Order The Truth About Getting Your Point Across here.
Part IX:
The Truth About Giving Feedback
et's talk about a comfortable topic for a minute. We're not necessarily talking about telling someone that they have a smudge on their nose. Sometimes feedback is very uncomfortable to give and can be even more uncomfortable to receive. For as uncomfortable as the feedback process is, there are usually very good nuggets which can be harvested and can contribute to a colleague's (or your) overall personal and professional growth.
This part contains five truths, as follows:
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Truth 41: Late feedback is just as bad as no feedback at all - Have you ever received a performance appraisal where your manager for the first time provides feedback on something you should have learned about months ago? Getting feedback is great, but when the feedback is so detached from the event that facts get blurred and action can't be taken, the recipient is likely to get super frustrated. Deliver timely feedback, don't save it up or dredge it out of memory when performance appraisal time hits.
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Truth 42: Environment matters - Giving and receiving feedback is already difficult. Add to it ringing phones or colleagues barging in on the conversation and you've got an doubly difficult situation to address. Don't let the environment in which you are giving feedback make the situation even more difficult.
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Truth 43: Focus on the behavior, not the person - Being called a "slacker" never did much for Marty McFly in the movie "Back to the Future". It also doesn't do much for your feedback sessions. Feedback should be tied to specific behaviors to help the recipient understand the feedback and know what to do to address it moving forward.
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Truth 44: Sometimes it’s best not to offer your feedback - Maybe you don't have a great relationship with a colleague, or your feedback isn't based on facts. Squelch the urge to provide feedback in some situations where the feedback will only fan the flames and cause the house to catch fire.
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Truth 45: Be open to feedback, then decide how to use it - As a recipient of feedback, it's important to accept a colleague's viewpoint and to graciously acknowledge what they have to say. It's up to you to decide what to do with the feedback. You have freedom of choice to either accept or reject the feedback but you also need to be aware of the consequences of your choices.
Order The Truth About Getting Your Point Across here.
Part X:
The Truth About Being a Good Listener
Being an active and empathetic listener is an important part of any leader's job. A leader can be hit with anything from "I'm having a difficult time solving this problem" to "I just broke up with my girlfriend" and can quickly get themselves into a stressful situation. As leaders, you want to be empathetic to your team members and help them through tough times. At the same time, you need to ensure you don't make the problem worse by committing some errors which only make a difficult situation even more difficult.
This part contains three truths, as follows:
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Truth 46: Listening means letting them talk - So you may think, "Boy, this is stating the obvious!" Before you take that leap, think about a situation where a colleague was too quick to offer suggestions or where you had a colleague's problem solved before they had a chance to get it out in the open. Listening isn't only for the recipient to understand a problem; it is also for the sender to talk through a difficult issue and to get some things off his or her chest.
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Truth 47: Don’t hang out a therapist shingle unless you’re a therapist - Many of us enjoy helping out others with problems and being a listening ear to others problems. This is all fine and well, but it's important to do this in moderation and to not let it affect your performance on the job or your relationship with your colleague.
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Truth 48: Keep stressful meetings from spontaneously combusting - Sometimes listening to others' problems can quickly get you into a highly charged situation where the other person becomes angry, stressed, or despondent. Having one person not in control of his or her emotions is difficult enough; but when the other person loses control it becomes a powder keg. Keeping things in check and knowing what to do when things get charged up can help to keep the lid from blowing off.
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Part
XI: The Truth About Informal Communications
Some of my most effective team communication has happened in hallways or around the water cooler. Allowing yourself to engage in the informal discussions shows you are human and allows you to get a pulse for what is going on in your organization. When kept in check, informal communications can be a great means of getting your point across and letting others do the same. However, you do need to keep the informal communications in check and don't participate to a point where the effectiveness of both you and your recipient is impacted due to the disruptions.
This part contains four truths, as follows:
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Truth 49: Informal doesn’t mean ineffective - Good communication doesn't always have to be planned, structured, and timed with a stopwatch. Sometimes it's the informal hallway discussions that yield great ideas and can give leaders great insight into their organization.
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Truth 50: Beware the drop-in - Ever heard someone say "got a minute?" It's pretty rare in my book that the "minute" in "got a minute" actually lasts only sixty seconds. It's more like five to ten minutes. Allowing for the drop-in to hit you up for something is great, just be prepared for what you're getting into.
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Truth 51: Focus on the big grapes on the grapevine - Ah, grapevines. Everything from, "Who's getting promoted?" to, "Who's dating who?" Some grapes are small and harmless, while others are huge and destructive. Don't worry about the little grapes on the grapevine; focus on the big ones and keep them from bursting.
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Truth 52: Be accessible, not open-door - Being "open door" is great in theory, so long as you don't have a lot of your own work to do. A practical alternative is to take on a "be accessible" persona where you openly welcome others to schedule time with you and provide perspective.
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Part XII: The Truth About Influencing Those Who Don't Work
for You
Leading those who have to follow you as a leader because of reporting relationships can be challenging enough for any leader. But what about those times when a leader is asked to lead a group of people who >don't report to the leader? It's times like this when true leaders jump to the head of the class. A leader who can get his point across with clarity, inspiration, and passion can motivate teams to deliver great results regardless of the reporting relationship.
This part contains three truths, as follows:
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Truth 53: Seven attributes to avoid if you want people to follow you - Arrogance, indecisiveness, disorganization, stubbornness, negativism, cowardice, and untrustworthiness. Seven attributes which make all the difference between great leaders and mediocre managers.
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Truth 54: Credibility humps get smoothed through learning - Great leaders understand that learning never stops throughout their careers. Learning is important particularly when a leader needs to establish credibility with a new team in a new area.
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Truth 55: Being partial breeds distrust - When leading cross-organizational teams, leaders need to demonstrate the utmost in impartiality and show the team they don't sit in any one camp. A partial leader means the team will never get to a period of trust with the leader or each other.
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Part XIII: The Truth About Communicating Globally
Sure, it's easier to communicate when everyone is in the same location and speaks the same language. But how about when communication means across the ocean versus across the hall? Or how about when an international colleague looks at you like you've got a third eye if you say "you da bomb!" as they wonder why you have called them an explosive device? In today's "glocal" world, the need to communicate globally will only increase and will require leaders to sharpen their communication style to accommodate those in Duluth, Delhi, or Denmark.
This part contains four truths, as follows:
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Truth 56: It’s not all about the Ivory Tower - This is particularly relevant to those who work at corporate headquarters in their company. Too often, those who work "at corporate" develop a viewpoint that everything outside of corporate works just like it does at corporate. Not so. It really helps to get out of the ivory tower once in an while and see how the rest of the world lives.
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Truth 57: You’ve got to talk to them even if it’s after hours - Particularly in today's electronic communication society, it is very easy for us to rely upon e-mail to get our point across to our colleagues on the other side of the world. E-mail is great, but you've got to get on the phone and do some real-time talking to build the relationship and the trust with international colleagues.
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Truth 58: Face-to-face paves the communication highway - Some of my best relationship building happened over an exotic dinner where I didn't know exactly what I was eating. Being face to face with your colleagues across the pond extends the trust factor, lets the colleagues know you care about them, and can make for some great stories.
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Truth 59: Just because they can speak in your native tongue doesn’t mean they understand everything you say - True, it may be that your colleagues can communicate in your native tongue, but when you start throwing "slanguage" into your speaking or start using terminology which ventures beyond your colleague's capabilities you'll likely confuse your colleagues and miss getting your point across. Keeping things simple help you effectively get your point across to your global colleagues.
